Incredible Artwork by Mark Fredrickson

Software Engineer And His Wife !!!!

Husband - hey dear, I am logged in.
Wife - would you like to have some snacks?
Husband - hard disk full.


Wife - have you brought the saree.
Husband - Bad command or file name.


Wife - but I told you about it in morning
Husband - erroneous syntax, abort, retry, cancel.


Wife - hae bhagwan !forget it where's your salary.
Husband - file in use, read only, try after some time.


Wife - at least give me your credit card, i can do some shopping.
Husband - sharing violation, access denied.


Wife - i made a mistake in marrying you.
Husband - data type mismatch.


Wife - you are useless.
Husband - by default.


Wife - who was there with you in the car this morning?
Husband - system unstable press ctrl, alt, del to Reboot.


Wife - what is the relation between you & your Receptionist?
Husband - the only user with write permission.


Wife - what is my value in your life?
Husband - unknown virus detected.


Wife - do you love me or your computer?
Husband - Too many parameters..


Wife - i will go to my dad's house.
Husband - program performed illegal operation, it will Close.


Wife - I will leave you forever.
Husband - close all programs and log out for another User.


Wife - it is worthless talking to you.
Husband - shut down the computer.


Wife - I am going
Husband - Its now safe to turn off your computer

Tappori Software Engg Song

appun jaise tappori s/w Engg. ko kya maalum...
saala programming kis chidiya kaa naam hai...

copy paste kaa kaam miltaa hai bass appun khush...!!!

fir yeh coding kaa lafdaa locha kaiko?

are kaiko ?

arre kaiko re?

fir ek din boleto appun ko project mila.....

ya haaaaaaaaaa!!!!

saala appun ka khopdi chakkar kha gaya ......

computer ke saath dil saala takkar kha gayaa...!!!

din bhar appun computer ke aagge...

koi lafdaa nahi kuch nahi...

Boss bola kya be munna saala tu bhi programmer bann gaya ...!!!

ye munnabhai kya coding bana rela hai baap...!!!

(fir ...? fir kya huwa..?)

fir ek din appun ne coding poora kar diya...

form poora karke appun ne testing ko bhej diya...!!!

lagataa tha ab appun kaa kaam khatam ho gaya ......!!!

par module me issues dekhake sala appun darr gaya ....!!!

appun ke saamne tester ne mere coding me ki galtiyaa nikali... aapun ke coding ki poori waat laga di.... appun udharich khadaa thaa... par
appun kuch nahi bola... kaiko bolega? kaiko...?

saala ek, ek kaam kiya thaa... usme bhi itne bugs...

par appun ek aansu nahi roya...

kaiko royega...?

kaiko..?

saala appunich yedaa thaa naa...!!!

agale din se phir wohi life chalu...

wohi mails forward karnaa, wohi messages, wohi template, wohi assignments... saala itnaa mails forward kiya...itnaa mails forward kiya... log samze mail server down hoyega... bhoolneka hai bhoolneka hai par kya karega...!!!

training milke bhi jab kaam nahi miltaa hai...

haa thoda bore huwa par chaltaa hai...

(phir ...? phir kya huwa..?)

fir ...?

fir kya...?

fir agale din appun ko aur ek project mila...!!!

shaappak...

saala appun ka khopdi phir chakkar kha gaya .......

computer ke saath dil saala phir takkar kha gayaa...!!!

Some Truth Factor of the Life

जीवन में कामयाब होने के लिए 3 factory लगाओ !!!!
1) दिमाग में Ice factory.
2) जुबान पर Sugar factory.
3) दिल में Love factory..
4) फिर life होगी SATISFACTORY

एक दिन सागर ने नदी से पूछा:
कब तक मिलाती रहोगी मुझे खारे पानी से ???
नदी ने हसकर कहा :
जब तक तुझ में मिठास न आ जाये तब तक !!!


1 tree makes 1 Lakh matchsticks.
But 1 matchstick can burn 1 Lakh trees.
Similarly 1 negative thought or doubt
can burn thousands of
dreams....!!
Think Positive !!!

चेहरे की हसी से हर गम छुपाओ,
बहुत कुछ बोलो पर कुछ न बताओ . ..
खुद न रूठो कभी, पर सबको मनाओ
ये राज़ है ज़िन्दगी का, बस जीते चले जाओ

वाह प्रभु क्या लीला तेरी:
चूहे बिल्ली से डरते है,
बिल्ली कुत्ते से डरती है ,
कुत्ता आदमी से डरता है ,
आदमी बीवी से डरता है ,
बीवी चुहे से डरती है .

दोस्ताना अंदाज़ में मुझ से किसी ने पूछा ,
तुम सबको email भेझते हो ? तुम्हे क्या मिलता है ?
मैंने हस कर कहा, देना लेना तो व्यापार है ,
जो देकर कुछ न मांगे, वो ही तो प्यार है ...